Santa Stalker
by RabidSquirrel1
Summary: Ron and Hermione have a slight disagreement over the Christmas carol "Santa Claus is coming to town."


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Santa Stalker

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A/N: A little late for Christmas, but better late than never. Sorry to everyone who was reading before, I didn't realize it would run together. I hope I fixed it now!

Ron leaned against the doorframe, watching and listening to Hermione as she placed the presents she had wrapped under the Christmas tree at the Burrow. Ron, Hermione, and Harry had finished their seventh year at Hogwarts the previous year and were now living at the Burrow while searching for their own flats and jobs.

Molly had refused to allow her daughter to remain at school by herself and had insisted that Ginny come home on the 'Express for Christmas. Ginny had pointed out that there would be many of her friends staying for holidays and she would by no means be by herself, but her mother had said that unless another Weasley was present, it was by herself. 

No one argues with Molly Weasley and her logic.

And, with her youngest two home, Molly had sent letters to her other children, suggesting that they come to the Burrow and give Harry his first real "Burrow" Christmas. Harry had been very shocked when even Bill and Charlie had showed up at home within a week, both bearing tans and armloads of gifts. Molly's suggestions to them had apparently been more like orders.

Hermione had been cheerfully singing muggle Christmas carols all day long. She had tried to teach a few of them to Ron and the twins. However, after the twins started to change the words around, creating vulgar little ditties that they sung for their mother under the pretense that Hermione had taught them, she had suddenly decided to keep them to herself. 

Ron was suddenly very confused. "Hermione?" 

The young woman spun around, spotted him, and flashed a smile. "Ron, you startled me!" She settled another gift under the tree. "I love Christmas, don't you?" She smiled at the tree happily then glanced at him again and saw the puzzled looked he was watching her with. "What is it?"

"You know that song you were just singing?" 

" 'Santa Claus is coming to town'. It's one of my favorites. Even if they do refer to Father Christmas as Santa Claus. I think the carol might be American. " Ron nodded. "Anyway, yes, what about it?"

"Why is the tune so bright when the words are so dark?"

Hermione just stared at Ron. "Dark? Ron, what are you talking about? It's a very nice, sweet song!" She exclaimed. 

It was Ron's turn to stare openly at her. "Hermione! The song is terrifying! I'm very glad wizards don't have a Sandy Claws or Father Christmas in our holidays."

"Would you please explain what you are talking about?" Hermione demanded, still sitting, hands on her hips. "Father Christmas is wonderful! And it's Santa Claus, Ron." Ron rolled his eyes.

"Do you even listen to the words you're singing?" He asked. "Muggles have Santa Claus to frighten their children into behaving all year round! I suppose it works quite well! I would be petrified if I knew some _stalker_ was watching me all year round!"

"Ron!" Hermione scrambled to her feet. "He is not a _stalker_!"

"Of course he is, Hermione. '_He sees you when you're sleeping, he knows when you're awake, he knows if you've been bad or good._" Ron dropped his voice into a menacing level. "_So be good for goodness sake_." He shuddered.

"Ron Weasley! He is not a stalker!" Hermione shook her head. "He is a jolly old man who comes every Christmas to visit little boys and girls! If the children have been good, Father Christmas leaves them toys and presents. If they have been naughty, he leaves a lump of coal in their stocking!"

Ron crossed his arms. "And how does this bloke know who has been good or bad?" 

"By watching them all year round, of course." Hermione answered.

"Exactly!" Ron replied promptly. "He watches them. All the time! He is a dirty old man, peering at children like that!" Ron shuddered again. Hermione pursed her lips, realizing Ron was stubborn enough not to ever agree with her. "I'll not allow my children to hear about him. I don't need them terrified!"

Hermione's head snapped around. "Well, my children will most definitely have Father Christmas, under both names, as a part of their Christmas!"

"You want them to be scared?" Ron demanded. Hermione shook her head.

"If you explain properly, the children will adore him! You will not be allowed to tell them Santa is horrible!"

"But Hermione-"

"No." Hermione interrupted Ron harshly. He looked so shocked that Hermione softened her tone. "I loved Father Christmas at Christmas as a little girl, Ron, and I want to be able to let my own children have that same love." 

She and Ron held each other's eyes for a moment, until Ron glanced away shyly. "All right, so maybe letting children know about Father Santa would be okay." He looked up at Hermione. "As long as you don't ever sing that song around them!" Hermione laughed.

"We'll see." After a silent moment, Hermione coughed. "Could you come help me bring Ginny's present down?" 

"Yeah, okay." Ron and Hermione smiled at each other and mounted the staircase.

Bill and Charlie watched the retreating forms of their youngest brother and his friend from the doorway until they disappeared. Bill reached into his pocket, pulled out a fistful of coins and counted swiftly.

"Bet you –" Bill glanced up. " –Three Galleons, eight Sickles, and five Knuts that Hermione realizes they both talked as if their own children would be the same ones before the end of tonight."

"No way." Charlie laughed. "Hermione's a bright girl, but she hasn't even realized that Ron fancies her something awful. I say it'll take until New Year until she realizes, and twice as long for Ron to pick it up."

The two brothers grinned, shook hands to seal their bet, and left the room to find and ask if any of their other siblings wished to join in on the fun. 


End file.
